Moon Knight Begs The Question: When Were You Obsessed With Egyptology?


And what it says about you…

There are but a few facts in this life:

  1. Pizza heals a broken heart.

2. Everyone on the planet will, at some point, become obsessed with Ancient Egypt.

The thing that Moon Knight , Marvel and Disney+ newest superhero jaunt, has us wondering above all else is when YOU were obsessed with Ancient Egypt, and what it says about us. Don’t worry, we put together those answers below. The results are… haunting.

Nefertiti Thee Stallion


If you dove into Egyptian history as a little kid, chances are you were precocious and a little bit annoying. Overall, you were sweet and excited about the world at large.

What it means

You’re laid back most of the time, but known to go down rabbit holes when no one is looking.

Egyptian Musicians


You were most likely looking for an outlet in your stuffy high school years wherever you could find it. Maybe you dressed up as Hatshepsut, or another obscure, yet interesting figure in Egyptian history. Maybe you watched The Mummy way too many times (LaKase).

What it means

You’re the kind of person who doesn’t like to feel stifled. You’re a creative at heart and like to explore your options when it comes to food, music, and Brendan Fraser films.

Hotep 101


The infamous Hotep stage for my melanated sisters and brothers. The overzealous, yet open-minded Freshman for everyone else. You took everything REALLY seriously and probably engaged in a smidge of misogyny. It’s ok, though, because you’ve grown out of it.

What it means

You, like all of us, are on the hunt for connection and meaning in this life. You want to feel special. News flash: you already are.

This fucking guy.


You’ve watched too much Ancient Aliens and just want to figure out what the deal is with Amarna and that “lightbulb”.

What it means

Welcome to hell, Buddy! This is the end of the line for us.

Just kidding. You’re just dealing with the inherent trauma of surviving a global P-word while most people pretend it’s not really happening. Believe in aliens. See signs only a few people will try to see. Just don’t be a dick about it!

So, were we right? Are you as obsessed with Egyptian history as we are, or are you just watching Moon Knight for a glimpse of those Oscar Isaac cakes? Let us know here or on the ‘gram!


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